Who do you want to be at 75?

The general question that appears from a young age for most is, “What do you want to BE when you grow up?” There are those horrendous tests in high school that attempt to draw a career out of your likes and dislikes (I believe I’m well suited to be a bus driver, if I remember correctly?), and from there you are steered into courses and life choices that may or may not fit. In high school I did a lot of child development and art classes, something that I wish I had pursued a bit more in college, but by the time it came to picking out a college and degree I began with a Major in Biology (seriously!), and then steered myself to Business Management, (mostly because it seemed terribly practical.) And isn’t the word practical the WORST when it comes to life decisions? 

I think everyone should, in a perfect world, have the ability to pay their bills, and live their life without a lot of inner struggle and too much worry over health and love and such. Having a fallback, or a PRACTICAL career option, is something everyone needs. It gives you the license to then practice what you truly love to do without worrying about what needs to be done. I know I have a love of a lot of things that may not make a career, but they nourish me and kindle a fire within my soul. I can be a lot of different things, not just one. There is no ONE life choice, ONE career option, or ONE way to live. Life has infinite options and we have time to explore the ones that mean the most to us. Whether they are conventional or not.

 Instead of thinking about what you want to do with your life as a young teen or twenty something, why not think of your life in terms of what you want to see it towards at the END if it? As in, who do you want to be when you are 75?

When I’m 75, I want to first and foremost have kids that are happy and well adjusted and are living successful lives, and by SUCCESSFUL I mean that they are living life on THEIR terms. They could be actresses, scientist’s, a house painter, a plumber, an artist, an architect, a garbage person, a famous sports star. I don’t really care about the logistics, or who (if?) they marry, or whether they tattoo their entire bodies and live at the circus. I just want them to be happy. I also want them to think I’ve done a good job by them, and to know I tried my very best with them, always. I want them to know that having them was the best thing I ever did, and that being their mom was all I ever really needed to be content.

When I am 75, I want to be married, to the same man I am married to right now (ha!) I want each year to bring us closer, just as it has been since the day we married. I want to remember that we are separate people, and we have goals of our own, and that is OKAY. He doesn’t have to be my everything, that is what friends and family and kids, and MY OWN SELF is for. I want us to be a couple that is always the most comfortable together, because he knows me to my very core, and I will be the same for him. He will be my home, always. And I wouldn’t hate it if we died on the same day, like the couple on The Notebook, because, well, that makes me smile. I don’t want to live a life without him in it.

When I’m 75, I want to have been a writer. I don’t need to have five novels on a bookshelf, or be published in any of the traditional ways, but I want to have written things that touch those around me. I want to write words that make me happy, and pulled things out of my insides that are beautiful and real and honest.

When I am 75, I want to be a prolific reader. I want to always be reading and finding things that inspire me. I want to explore new genre’s and live different lives through various characters, both real and fictional. I want to be surrounded by the books I adore, and always have a book or two on my nightstand that I am dying to begin.

When I am 75, I want to still be a hopeful optimist. I want to believe in the good in people, always. I want to believe that good will prevail, that good things will happen to those that ARE good, and that if I really believe and hope and pray for something, that it will happen.

When I am 75, I want to be surrounded by things that make me content and happy. I want my home to be a haven to myself and my family, where people feel welcome, and I feel content to walk in the door.  I want the things I have to speak directly to me, in a way that if you walk inside you would know that I have lived there.

And finally,

When I am 75, I want to be truly and unspeakable happy with myself. I want to be confident in who I am, non judgmental of those around me, funny, well read, and honest. I want to be elegant, but quirky. Someone who has travelled widely and tried new things and always tried to be a better person. I want to have aged gracefully, realizing that age is only a number and how we feel on the inside is all that counts. I want to be a Grandma that cuddles her grand kids near when they visit, always kisses and hugs my children goodbye no matter how old they get, and holds hands with my husband in the car. I want to be emotionally open and well loved.

The funny thing is, when I look at this list I don’t see a set career, or notice whether I’ve lived in fancy houses or drove expensive cars. There is no mention of looks or clothes or appearance. And while I am vain enough to know I will probably dye my gray hair until I’m in my grave, and that clothes and accessories and all that superficial stuff makes me terribly happy, my life is really about the roles I fill. Being a mother and wife are terribly important to me, the most important. As is my relationship with myself. I’d like to think I’m a perpetual learner of my own spirit in a way. Taking each day as it comes, and making sure that I am always learning from my mistakes, and always, always trying to be a better me.

Tell me, how do you see yourself at 75?