I‘ve been REALLY into positive self talk lately, mostly because I think I could use it. I’ve always thought I had pretty good self-esteem and that I felt good about myself, but then I’d say things to myself during the day that didn’t match that. Things like:
“I look old today. Where did those wrinkles come from?”
“Why is my hair so gray? I look older.”
“The back of my legs have so much cellulite. I shouldn’t wear these shorts.”
“My hair is so thin. I wish I had (insert name here)’s hair.”
“I am so weak. Why do I let people walk all over me?”
“I can’t do this.”
“I am a bad wife/mother/friend/etc”
I’ve noticed lately that find myself being self-deprecating a lot. It’s a bad habit of mine. No one likes to brag, but most everyone likes to throw themselves under the bus. I’d never say this stuff to my friends, but I say it to myself a lot. Which is not okay! It’s probably a knee jerk reaction knowing that if I say something bad about myself, I’ll beat someone else to it. Again, it is a bad habit I just don’t think about. It’s ingrained.
HOWEVER, I am switching things up. Instead of focusing on the stuff I don’t like about myself, or picking myself apart, or saying I can’t do something before I try it, I literally stop it in its tracks. Here are some examples:
When I wake up and look in the mirror…”I look good today. I am healthy. I am happy and lucky to have this day.”
When I am nervous before a gym class…”I am strong, I can do anything I put my mind to.”
When I am at the gym and pushing myself and want to stop…”I am strong, I am an athlete, I can do this.”
When I am feeling guilty over mom life…”I am a good mom. I love my children and they know this. I am doing my best.”
When I lay in bed and know that I have to wake up really early in order to have my morning alone time…”I am lucky to have this time to myself. I am happy to wake up no matter how little sleep I get.”
Do you see how you can change things for yourself with this little shift in self talk?
It all can sound and feel a little hokey at first. I get it! I think that switching from a place of negativity to a place of positivity makes a HUGE difference in life. You believe what you think. I use “I am” statements to hype myself up. Because I AM a lot of good things, and if I say it enough it will be true. All of it. I won’t belittle myself or say things that I wouldn’t say to a dear friend.
It starts with US. If we don’t speak well about ourselves and really, TRULY believe it, then who will?
Tell me, what can you say positive about yourself by starting with “I am….?”