I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving, and long weekend. We spent it with friends (the friends we see every weekend and the only people I see lol,) and it was amazing. I have been a military wife for nearly 20 years and we have spent many, MANY holidays away from family and it is truly what you make of it. I know this year has been weird, but in other ways not much has changed. We have enjoyed lots of holidays with just the 4 of us, some in a group of friends, and only a few with family, and I like each one.
And an update from my post last week where I chatted about needing to reach out for help with my anxiety! I went last Monday and I was so nervous! My heart was beating and my hands were sweaty, but I told her what I had been feeling and let her read what I had written down (basically just how I felt when I was at my worst.) We both decided that I am going to talk to a counselor for a couple of sessions to see if that will help first, and then if I need further help with medication we can go from there.I was relieved when I left and I am looking forward to talking things out with an impartial person. I will keep you updated once I visit (virtually) with them. Again, I appreciate you being here for me and I truly am thankful for YOU and your support.
Let’s get into 3 things to think about this week!
1) I used to always feel that bad days or bad feelings were the worst, and I would try to force myself out of it with positivity or just ignoring it, really.
While I believe in positivity and affirmations (I use them daily!), I am learning not to “bypass” how I feel. One thing I wrote down in my journal this week was, “Don’t be afraid of your sadness and feelings because they are showing you what to work on.”
I love the thought that what bothers us or triggers us is our biggest teacher. Bad days are good teachers! I know now that when I get bothered by something someone says to me, that it is because it triggers a feeling inside me that feels bad. That bad feeling is teaching me what I need to know. When I have bad feelings about my body and/or food, I know it is teaching me to love myself as is and that there is no perfect person. What are your sad/ mad feelings teaching you? Sometimes we have to dig done deeper to find the REAL reason we are sad or not feeling good, but once you do it can teach you a lot about yourself.
2) Something else that I wrote in my journal this week…
“Its okay to be human. To mess up. To not be perfect. It’s okay to be sad and off and melancholy. It’s okay to not be able to handle things.”
Sometimes I like to sit in my chair in the morning and say, “What do I need to know today?” Then I write what comes to mind. Can you envison yourself as a little child, feeling the way you do now? What would you say to them? Give yourself the love and advice that they need, you might be surprised what you write down.
3) What if you approach everything in your life like this…
Believe you are good enough AS IS. You don’t have to be anything or do anything to be better or loved. It is possible to grow out of love rather than hate. You don’t need to shame yourself into achieving, and you don’t need to feel bad in order to get things done.
I love the thought of this. I have spent many years trying to shame myself to be better. Shame myself into working harder or denying myself, shame myself for being human. I am working on ALLOWING more, meaning, I don’t have to force everything. Life works in cycles, like the seasons. There are growing cycles and resting cycles and it’s okay to not be ON all of the time. I notice this with my body, as a woman I have cycles that my body flows with and it changes accordingly. Leaning into that means I can give myself grace for so many things. I don’t have to be so hard on myself, the world is okay if I am not ON 24/7 and always pushing and fighting against the current.
Here’s to learning to go with the current more than against, and giving ourselves grace, and knowing that the best love in the world is the acceptance and love we can give ourselves. Give yourself a big hug, that little girl inside of you deserves it.