I wrote last week about the unexpected joys of having a son, but now my ever evolving mama guilt is kicking in and I NEED to express my love of having a daughter. (No one tells you about the guilt that pops up when your child is born, and then never ends, DO THEY?) This little girl up there? She literally made my life, she was a dream come true for me and the baby who made me a mom first, so she holds a special place in my heart. I love my children equally, but I also love them both for different reasons (other than the obvious fact that they are MINE and they are pure perfection, of course;) What would I do without them?!
Here are 5 things I love about having a daughter:
1) One of the best things about having a girl is that I feel like I get her. I know how a girl thinks, what she dreams about, and all the thoughts that will most likely run through her head. I get the rivalries in high school and the confusion over boys. I know she’ll get all crazy with hormones and be unbalanced and nuts for a bit (or forever, ha!) I understand the love of Barbie dolls, Calico Critter’s, dressing for your mood, and wanting to write secret thoughts in journals. While my daughter is different than me in a lot of ways, I also see a lot of similar ways, too. (Especially in our thought processes and emotional life.) I feel like there are less unknowns for me in dealing with and raising a girl, and that is pretty awesome.
2) One of the things I adore about having a girl is dressing them! For a long time I could pick out outfits and doll her up any way I wanted to, and that was so fun. She was bedazzled in pink and ruffles and bows for several years there, and buying her clothes is still really fun. She has her own sense of style and dresses herself now (and it can look straight up CRAZY most of the time!), but I still have fun helping her pull together whatever look she is going for, and I support whatever vision she has going on. Which means often times she looks straight up homeless. Seriously.
3) When you have a girl, there is a perception that she will be yours forever. I think sons tend to grow up and get married and drift away a bit, but a girl is by your side forever. My mom and I are like that, and we are both really close with my grandmother as well. I don’t intend to be her friend as she grows up, I’m her mother first, but when she is grown I know we will be close. There is a different bond between a mother and a daughter, and I hope we continue to grow even closer as she gets older.
4) Something that I love seeing daily is how my husband is as a father to our daughter. You see, my husband is a pretty tough guy. He’s in the military, he loves sports with a passion, he wears camo shorts almost exclusively, he just is a man’s man through and through. Yet, if his daughter asks him to wear a crown and stick his pinky out while he drinks tea, he will. He has, since the night she placed her in his arms and he stared at her for two hours straight saying, “Is she really ours? Can we really take her home?,” been her biggest fan. He literally melts for her. He cuddles her big seven year old self and sings her songs at night and hands her his heart daily. It has been an honor watching him be her daddy, and watching him adore this wild haired, blue eyed little girl.
5) I love knowing that I can teach her that women can be anything that they want to be, if they try hard enough. I want her to be smart and go after what she wants. I want her to be educated and self assured and strong. I want to lead by example, so she can see that you can achieve your dreams no matter what they are. She can be a Supreme Court Justice, or a stay at home mom. She can play all the sports she wants, or write a novel. I don’t really care what she does, but I want her to be independent and have the ability to take care of herself. I know she can’t skip all the mistakes in life and zoom right into being confident and self assured, but I plan on guiding her to being the best she can be, even if she isn’t sure what that is yet. She is a beautiful person who has her future in front of her, and if she is happy and knows she has tried her best always, my job will be done.
Tell me, what have you learned about having a daughter? Or, what have you learned from your mom that has made all the difference?