Target top (similar) and sandals (similar); ℅ Elizabeth and West midi skirt; Rayban sunglasses.
I’ve been doubting myself lately, particularly this space and the reasons why I blog, and also comparison wise. I’ve been writing here and posting for more than three years, and I wonder off and on, “what exactly is the point?” This blog has become such a huge part of my life. I mean, I think in blog posts at this point, and rarely find myself without something to write about. I enjoy coming up with different looks and showing you different ways to wear things. If I stopped blogging (which I’m NOT), I would have a huge amount of time to fill, and I have no idea how I would ever fill it.
Doubt creeps in. I look at blogs that are younger than mine, who are much more successful, and I wonder, “what am I not doing that they are?” I don’t begrudge anyone success, I really don’t. I just look at it in a way that I must be missing that certain factor that creates more page views and opportunities. This blog of mine has always seen growth, but is has always been a slow growth. There are no overnight success stories here. Every single page view and reader has been fought for, and earned.
I do have great opportunities, daily, through this space. I have a (small) income generated solely by this blog, and I meet wonderful people that come back and read, daily. These moments, especially the emails and comments from YOU, are often the reasons I cling to when I wonder why on earth I continue blogging. I love writing, especially. In my wildest dreams, the ones I never say out loud but keep inside my heart, I dream of writing here for a living. Traveling and meeting other women, creating a space for women like YOU to come and feel good about yourselves. I have a lot of stories that I’d love to put down on paper, I just need the courage to do so. I have dreams of designing clothes, working with top brands, and showing a point of view that is unique to myself and relateable for others.
In essence, I doubt myself and this blog, a lot. I doubt that I’m unique enough, or that I only shop at Target, or that I’m in my mid 30’s and I’m too old for this, and I doubt that there is no point to blogging sometimes. I have learned something, though! If I quit every time the thought came into my head, I wouldn’t have lasted six months. I wouldn’t have met some wonderful women that I’m honored to call friends, or been given all the opportunities I’ve been a part of. Which means that even though I have doubt in my heart, this is worth it. I will persevere. I will continue because I truly believe that what I’ve built is important.
And that’s enough for now.