My second set of eyes

My little girl is turning seven today (don’t even start, because I CAN’T EVEN handle it), and I cannot help but think about how much has changed since her arrival in my life. The second she was placed in my arms and I became a mom was the moment that I learned that I was no longer just ME. I was never going to see the world through just my eyes ever again, I had a second set to think about, too.

Things I often took for granted or never even thought about at all, worry me a lot. Sexy ads in magazines that she may see, any comment or thought that a ‘girl’ can’t do something, mean girls at school, underage drinking, date rape, eating and body issues…there are so many things to stress over when you have a little one. And sometimes I think having a girl is harder, because often life is a little bit more cruel to girls, especially teenage ones. I look at that face above, the precious baby in a vintage bonnet, and I want only THE BEST things for her. I want no negative thoughts to enter her head, or crazy people to make her think she should be something she’s not. Yet I can’t protect her from it all. I can guide her and teach her to the best of my ability, but at some point she will have to take in the world and see it for what it really is. She’ll be hurt and lied to, she’ll have someone tell her she is fat or not pretty. She’ll be hurt and confused and damaged at some point. This devastates me.

I wonder sometimes if I just teach her everything I have ever learned, about boys and school and life, maybe she won’t have any problems? Maybe she’ll skip over the awkward years, and magically enter her twenties being confident, successful, happy? My dream for her is to be as sure of herself as she is now. Because seven year old girls are full of themselves. It’s awesome. She sees herself now as I see her, which means she is the best, most talented little girl on the planet. I tell her all the time she is beautiful, funny, smart, awesome at sports and art, a great friend and sister, kind to others, and thoughtful. Molly at seven is exactly who I want her to be, so much so that I wish I could freeze time and keep her like this for eternity. 

Because she is a shining star in my life.

She is my second set of eyes, my chance to see the world as she sees it. She is pure magic, rolled up into a curly haired little girl who is the light of my life. Someday (when she is in her late twenties and is independent and college educated and all that…;), I hope she looks down at her newborn child that is placed in her arms, and she will see EXACTLY how much she has meant to me. She will instantly get it, the fact that a mother’s love is like no other. Because the opportunity to teach her and love her has been the best seven years of my life.